Do you feel like negative person? ... and so the adventure begins
What's going on?
Working over hours, weekends, and your boss promotes again... not you? How is it you work your butt off and get anything barely from it? It seems all as it should: you are dedicated to your work, doing a good job, sacrificing time when you could doing something nice. Hobby, maybe? But you are so focused on your work that you do not even know the meaning of the word 'Hobby' anymore? So what's going on? What more can you do? How about reverse this question? What less can you do?
What less can you do?
What less can you do?
Less self-diminishing thoughts and Less mentally whipping yourself?
Don’t worry, I certainly do not ask you to believe in unicorns and magic pills.
Exercise is simple (though it may not be so easy as you think): take few next days and observe yourself and your thoughts. What battle is going out there? Track down as many beliefs about money as possible.
Start from those popping into your head when you look at the picture on the left – b*tch or empowered women? Is she wrong or just having fun?
In the beginning, it will be all messy and maybe not so obvious to recognize. Very ‘loud’ thoughts followed by others more silent? Note them all down. You can sometimes have of Dejavu… Because some of those thoughts will sound ridiculously similar to what one of your parents was saying, or teacher… What does this mean about you? Nothing. That’s not your thoughts. Only some thought pattern you learned from other people.
Do your thoughts can really be related to your bank account? Yes. WHY? Easily. If you do not believe you are skilled to make money, how you want to do so?
Obviously, you will deny it ‘I am skilled! I graduated from XYZ, I work in this industry for X years. I am more than skilled, and I deserve it!’ Yes, you do. YOU DESERVE IT. And now is the time to do a reality check if you truly believe so.
How? Take a few days and observe your thoughts. If any of the thoughts pointed below or similar pops in your head when something goes south. Note it. Notebook on your phone will work just fine.
People have a lot of inner dialogues, mostly unaware of it. To address your concerns, this does not mean anything bad about you. They’re some thoughts you heard and, for some reason, soaked deeper than you would wish for or even suspect. The human brain is more complicated than we give it credit for.
Tracking down sabotaging thoughts is almost halfway to improve your relationship with money, aka a way to earn more and more.
You can be convinced that your thoughts have nothing to do with your wallet. Or that it does not matter what you think in general. It’s only in your head.
Think, if what you believe would be true or what you do would be the straight way to success, why aren’t you rich by now?
If you want to change the outcome, change what you are doing. How much change? Depend… How far are you from your goals?
What to look for
Thoughts that block you from earning more money
How many of those thoughts are yours? It’s just the tip of an iceberg. Those are just examples to give you a general idea of what are you looking for. Many people share similar thought patterns, as well as you will find some unique for you and your experiences. Be mindful about them, and most importantly, be kind to yourself. If you will notice such thoughts once or repeating many times, do not scold yourself. Do not speak to yourself anything that you would not say to the most important person in your life (real or not) which you could not afford to lose. Be supportive and let those thoughts pass. If they appear again, notice them, and let them go. Have this ‘Aha’ moment – ‘Aha, this thought again’, note it, and go to think some other thoughts. Even if it’s: tea or coffee? What do I want?
It is not the best time
My Kids always interrupt me
I do not have time
I am too busy
I need to have ‘a, b, c’ to make more money
I need to know ‘w, z, y’ to start doing it
I need to start another course before I can make money
I need to wait until my (training, certification, website) is complete
I will do it tomorrow
This is a waste of time
I do not need help
I will not ask for help/advice
I know best
It’s always like that
I am never gonna figure it out
I am confused
I am overwhelmed
Money is hard to make
I need to work hard to make money
I never have enough money
I do not know where my money goes
I do not know the first thing about money
Money stresses me out too much
My work/business is killing me
I hate dealing with the bills
I have no idea how much debt I have
I do not want to open my credit card statements
I am too afraid to…
I am always broke
I live from paycheck to paycheck
Money is bad
Rich people are dishonest and power-lust
Money is the root of all evil
It’s XYZ person’s fault
If only somebody…
I am working with lazy people. It’s all because of them.
My family never had first-class life…
I do not have enough support
Other people have easier
Setting goals is a waste of time, I always know what to do
Setting goals is a waste of time, there is always something to do
Setting goals is a waste of time, there is too much to do
I can not start I have not enough knowledge
I am not… Enough (good enough, pretty enough, outspoken enough…)
I am just like that
I cannot change
I am not … creative / a planer / technical/humanistic
I cannot do this anymore
I am too old to change
I am too young to be respected by people in my business/office
I am stupid
I am an idiot
I am useless
I will never get it
I am so terrible at …
I do not understand
I do not know what to do (so I will not do anything)
No one wants what I have to offer
I never get what I want
Nothing I do works
It does not matter if I do this
I will not figure it out
I cannot do anything right
I did it wrong
I should give up
There is no point
I do not have fancy/any education
I cannot afford it
I am not a morning person
I do not like to follow a plan/schedule
I cannot set goals
I don’t like setting goals
I am an introvert
I am not good at …
I do not deserve it
My life will never be awesome
It’s too… much, too confusing, too late
You observed yourself, you noted thoughts, and?
First of all, make a habit of it. With time you will notice more and more thoughts. Some are new, some you just didn’t notice earlier, some will be triggered by circumstances (people, places… even smell), others will repeat themselves often.
So what now? Here you will find a useful technique that will help you transform your negative thoughts into supportive ones.